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| Image credit: Photo by josef.stuefer on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons |
My husband and I were hanging out with an old friend recently, one who is aware of his sex addiction but doesn't have direct experience with addiction herself. She keeps in touch with a lot of friends through Facebook and asked, "So, Mark, why aren't you on Facebook yet?"
"It's too triggering for me. I've used things like that in the past, and social networking is dangerous for me. Old lovers can look me up and new people can seek me out, and it's too easy for me to use that as a gateway to get involved with them."
"But you could just say no to those people."
Mark laughed and said, "You could just say no. But that's the problem, I can't. If I had been able to say no, I wouldn't be an addict. It's easier for me just not to put myself into that situation by saying no to Facebook than it is to resist the temptation to say yes to an inappropriate friend request, or worse, to try to stop once I'm interacting with someone. Sort of like it would be easier for an alcoholic not to go into a bar or a liquor store than to say no a drink sitting in front of them."
"Ok, you have a point. No Facebook then."
"Nope."
This post was originally published at The Second Road.
So good to have you back!
ReplyDeleteI am proud of your husband for sharing his reason himself. I hope my husband and I are able to be there someday.
ReplyDeleteI love facebook... But after finding out about my husbands adiction I scalled back. I took the whole "i wouldn't ask you to do anything I am not willing to do myself" aproach. So we both got rid of any friends we don't have "real life" contact with.
Thanks for sharing your story, I find hope in your posts. :)
You know, I find Facebook a little dangerous, even if just for chatting with old boyfriends and wondering "what if." And I'm someone who doesn't have a problem! I think Mark has made a wise decision, here.
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